It is the first day of second grade and already Buddy is disappointed because his class has a new teacher, not the one he wanted, and there is a new student, Bea, who is boisterous and much too pushy for the reserved Buddy--and who insists that they are friends.

A.J. and his friends get a Personal Digital Assistant named Miss Porter as a substitute teacher, who can order pizza and tell endless jokes, but grows power-hungry when her system is changed and tries to take over Ella Mentary School.

When a British student-teacher arrives, A. J. and his friends wonder if her all-black clothing and love of blood sausage mark her as a vampire. Meanwhile, Mr. Granite hopes her musician-boyfriend will stay away long enough for a math lesson.

Ella Mentry School hires a health teacher who tries to force the students to eat healthy foods and exercise, whether they want to or not.